Dear Darah and Elanah,
I have decided to start a blog so that I can talk to you whenever I am not with you. As your mummy, there is so much I want to tell you. To begin, I want you to know that the two of you are the best thing that ever happened to me. I have had a lot of good things happen in my life, but by far you two are the best. You better already know this but I will still remind you a lot because I want you to know this always. There isn’t a better gift in my life that I could hope for – the two of you are my sunshine. I want you to always, always know how much I love you.
You, my brave and resilient girls, have gone through some major changes this year, and one of those changes is that I am no longer living with you. That must feel scary and that must hurt. I know it feels scary to me and hurts me, and you are so little. But even though it’s scary, we all have to stick together and stay strong and remember that it’s the love that makes the family. You can be oceans apart from a person and still with them in your heart. You are mine forever, and I am your mummy forever, and nothing can ever change that. But still, it’s hard, I know. So when you feel like it feels hard or scary, I want you to know that you can always come to me and talk to me about how you feel. And I also want you to know that you can always talk to God about how you feel. That is what I do when I am scared and I am missing you.
It’s hard for your mummy to be away from you, but I am very glad that you are with your Momma Si. She is a very good mom to you and you are lucky to have her. She will make sure that you are cared for whenever I am not around, and I will make sure that you are cared for whenever she is not around. For always. No matter how old you are. You will always have a mom to lean on. That’s one of the benefits of having more than one adoring parent!
This summer, I am going to go and stay in Buffalo, with Aunt Missy. Doing this is going to help me to be a happy and strong mom for you. I want you to come and stay with me there, but when you are at your home, with Momma Si, I am going to Skype you and talk to you every day. Which leads me to why I made this blog.
I created this blog as a place for me to write to you, even if it’s just to tell you I miss you and goodnight. I want you to know that I always think of you and that you are part of my day, every moment of every day. I will write you here to tell you about my days and to share my thoughts with you, and to be your mummy whenever we are separated. I want you to have this to look back on whenever you feel scared or lonely or far away from me. It helps me to write to you here because I love you and I love to share things with you. I am excited that soon you will both be able to read!
Today you are with your Momma Si. I am just sitting on my bed, listening to the cars go by and thinking about how lucky I am to have the perfect hexlings. Hey, did you know that I INVENTED the word “hexlings” just for you? Yep. I think it’s the perfect word to describe you. A “hexling” is a very smart and loving and perfect child of a witch. Did you know your mummy likes to pretend she’s a witch? Yes. It’s true. I do. And sometimes I really think I am one! I’ll tell you more about that another time. Oh, and I just had a bowl of Raisin Bran, and I thought it was too sugary. You’re in the little town of Havana (where Momma Si grew up and played her high school drums) right now, and I bet you are having so much fun. I’m going to go to mass soon. I wish you could go to mass with me. Maybe sometime you will.
It’s sunny out, and I hope you are running around, plotting ninja mayhem, in the sun.
I am thinking of you and I love you.